AI Report Card: Top 10 Results - Ain't Ezi Saying Goodbye to Chikezie

Again, thank you for your patience – but now that I am a free man I’ll quickly rundown the elimination show – I know, so behind the times!

Anyway, the most blatant thing about Idol has always been it’s whoring out of the corporate sponsorship – this is not a revelation, I know. From the Ford commercials, which after all these years they were able to invent a clever, kinda hot one this week, to the shameless Coke cups that obscure half the judges’ torsos, to the giant Ford truck wheel that’s used as a table in the singers lounge during the Top 24. Well this week Idol has unabashedly, unequivocally become an hour-long Apple iTunes commercial. Oh, I know they’ve been hawking the iTunes MP3s for weeks, but we actually saw a true-to-life mini-infomercial. Ah, corporate prostitution…gotta love it.

That the classic Dolly Parton will be mentor next week fills me with joy, though it should prove fascinating; the theme – according to FOX - is not Country week but rather Dolly’s songbook. Now, I grew up Dolly, so it will be interesting to see which Idol chooses what. Hers is a colossal catalogue, filled with archetypal, ingenious songs, written that prove to be the essence of County Music history.

It thrills me…until I realize that thanks to America and its misguided patriotism, we’ll have to endure Kristy Lee Cook.

These group songs that have proven constant embarrassments for 7 seasons now get even more discomforting when you realize that not a single male Idol - with the exception of Chikezie - has any rhythm whatsoever. But it’s always fun to watch the ArchuD2 and Michael Hutchence Johns give it their best, unintentionally hilarious shots.




Chikezie in the bottom three was not unpredicted. No, his wasn’t even one of the 3 worst (that would be Kristy, Ramiele and Archu). But, as everyone knows – and let’s all say it together boys and girls – American Idol is NOT a singing contest – so, a goofy, talented, black man wasn’t going to make it far on a show with a predominantly lily-white, tween demographic (those are the facts, ma’am). But the fact that Syesha was there WAS a shock if only because hers was one of the better vocals of the evening. And, I am proud that America saw through the charade that is Jason Castro – hopefully, he’ll stop assuming that he’s a sure-bet and this gives him a kick in the ass. Not saying it will help him vocally, but there’s no harm in the attempt.

And, in lieu of Ramiele and Kristy, here’s how it went down.



And that’s a damned shame.